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When a couple decided to have a sex or make love, it means they both want to have some fun together. Well, I also thought sex is meant to be an enjoyable and happy experience especially with someone you love. But I guess it won’t be any fun if you get pain during intercourse. The enjoyable and happy experience suddenly becomes a dream for both of you.

If you get pain during intercourse, it might be dyspareunia (say: “dis-par-oon-ya”). It is painful sexual intercourse for women. The pain can be in the genital area or deep inside the pelvis. The pain is often described as sharp, burning or similar to menstrual cramps. The symptom is reported almost exclusively by women, although the problem can also occur in men. The causes are often reversible, even when long-standing, but self-perpetuating pain is a factor after the original cause has been removed. It is important to talk to your doctor if you have this problem because there are effective treatments for many of the causes.

Any part of the genitals can cause pain during sex. Some conditions affect the skin around the vagina. The pain from these conditions is usually felt when a tampon or penis is inserted into the vagina, but pain can also occur even when sitting or wearing pants.

The top causes of dyspareunia are:

• Problems with your cervix, such as infections of the cervix and tender places on it
• Womb trouble including fibroids
• Endometriosis
• Ovary problems mostly because cysts on the ovary or if the tip of the penis hits an unusually positioned ovary.
• Pelvic inflammatory disease (PID). The tissues deep inside become badly inflamed and so the pressure of intercourse causes deep pain.
• Ectopic pregnancy, because pressure on it can be very painful.

However, sometimes dyspareunia happens because of certain issues, such as well-endowed partner, what I mean is some women complain that their partner’s penis is too big. Menopausal or post-menopausal dryness can be a cause, but you can help it by treatment with HRT pills or hormone cream or an ordinary sex lubricants. Moreover, vaginal infections (trichomonas, herpes), injury to the vulva or vagina, genital warts, vulvitis, haematoma of the clitoris, urethral caruncle, foreign body in the vagina, vulvodynia and cancer can be superficial causes for the pain.

If you suffer dyspareunia and has understood why the pain occurs, I guess if it is related to medical causes, you better ask your doctor how to overcome it. You have to discuss your symptoms with your doctor. Depending on the situation, you may need to see a doctor who specializes in women’s problems.

If you see your doctor, dyspareunia is treated by the taking following steps:

• Carefully taking a history. For example he may ask your sex activities, such as have you tried a sexual lubricant or more foreplay? Is it painful every time you try to have sex? Are there other problems associated with sex? These are some of the questions that your doctor will need to discuss with you.

• Examining your genital area or give you a pelvic exam to duplicate as closely as possible the discomfort and to identify a site or source of the pelvic pain.

• Clearly explaining to the patient what has happened, including identifying the sites and causes of pain, and removing the source of pain when possible.

• Prescribing very large amounts of water-soluble sexual or surgical lubricant during intercourse, such as petroleum jelly and moisturizing skin lotion.

• Instructing the receiving partner to take the phallus of the penetrating partner in their hand and control insertion themselves, rather than letting the penetrating partner do it.

• Encouraging the couple to add pleasant, sexually exciting experiences to their regular interactions, such as bathing together (in which the primary goal is not cleanliness), mutual caressing without intercourse, and using sexual books and pictures.

• Recommending a change in coital position to one admitting less penetration.

• Recommending a device for limiting penetration.

One thing you should know is dyspareunia also occurs on men. Sometimes because of skin disorders on the penis or such causes. Therefore, you should be more careful, especially it is all for the sake of your enjoyable sex activity which can affect your relation with spouse. I bet you really want a happy marriage… don’t you?

the image credit by Marek Vesely

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