TRANSLATE
Trust is one important thing to build when you are in a relationship. I’ve ever heard someone said that it takes years to build trust but it only takes minutes to destroy it. Well, one thing to easily destroy trust is lie. Some women (it could be you) say that in a relation, the person who has a big chance to lie is man. Do you know why? Well, let’s find out why men lie to women.
1. SOME MEN SEE IT AS A NORMAL THING TO DO
Well, sometimes they don’t see anything wrong with lying. This means that some guys are just liars and that’s what they do best. Evidently, these men don’t see how a lack of trust will undermine any love relationship. But since they’ve never examined the issue, they will continue to lie because it has helped them achieve their short-term objectives in the past.
2. THEY THINK THAT THE CONTENTS OF LYING IS UNIMPORTANT STUFF
Maybe for them it is just for fun and say something that isn’t totally true because it is not very important to them. They think that nothing bad will happen if they do it. It’s part of the freedom of doing and saying whatever they want, whenever they want.
3. MEN WOULD CHOOSE TO LIE BECAUSE WOMEN WOULD NOT UNDERSTAND
This is probably the biggest reason why men lie. They have a fear that by telling the truth the woman will evaluate solely from her point-of-view and not consider his side of the story. Rather than deal with this situation, a guy will often tell what he sees as a “little white lie” in order to avoid setting off a chain-reaction of other unwanted emotions in the woman. However, this also becomes a convenient “excuse” for men that justifies their negative actions and minimizes the “wrong” of lying.
4. A THOUGHT THAT WOMEN CAN’T FACE THE TRUTH
Well, before they lie, they may have a conviction that the woman cannot manage her upsets. If he lives with that woman, then it makes life at home totally miserable. If the relationship is already unstable, this added upset may lead to complete chaos.
5. BY LYING, THINGS WILL GO ON
They tend to lie to avoid confrontation because some men think that maybe things will change in the future and this will all become a non-issue to the woman. In addition, lying is a selfish way to protecting the liar without considering the other person’s best interests.
6. THE TRUTH IS OUT OF EXPECTATION
In the effort to impress a woman and show a proud front, a man will often exaggerate, distort, or delete certain truths. That’s because the truth about them may not be good enough in the man’s opinion to hold the attention of the woman in a competitive dating world. For example when the others say you are fat, but he tells the opposite when the truth is you are fat. For men, this can safe everything. Once this pattern is established, a man may continue until his lies are discovered.
Lying destroys trust in a relationship and it could be the first reason to destroy a relationship. Both of you should put trust as a foundation of the relation.
the image credit by B S K
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fastoffice
on November 20 2008
There is only one reason men lie to woman - insecurity. Either insecurity about you or themselves. Usually the latter.
The ONLY reason here that is actually true is No. 3. Men learn to lie as a kid from their parents and their demands and their expectations. A lie is a way to avoid confrontation, a way to soften something you did wrong and a way to bolster your self-esteem. Most men carry this into adulthood with the women in their lives. Men rarely lie to their guy friends this way. Why? Because our guy friends don’t judge so harshly because they feel the same way sometimes.
Men in general see woman as illogical, judgmental beings. I know its not 100% true, but its how we see you. Its hardwired into our brains. So to avoid conflict (like with our parents) we’ll lie. Its a behavioral habit thats hard to break.
The NUMBER ONE mistake women make in relationships is thinking being 100% honest ALL the time is healthy. We don’t feel you need to know everything nor should we feel a compulsion to tell you. Trying to force to be honest all the time forces us into a corner and we’ll try to lie our way our of it.
If women were less judgmental and understood that men don’t feel a need to tell you everything like you feel a need to, you’d have less conflict in your relationship. Stop trying to be his Mom and just be his lover.
Kevin
http://www.fastoffice.com
Martina
on November 26 2008
What about when you’ve given the men freedom to express himself as long as you’re there and he play safe? Yet he goes behind your back chasing everything in a skirt! The trust is gone so is the relationship. Or better yet when you come across in writing everything he is or had been up to try he continues to lie especially when you say its over
linda
on May 12 2009
Men Suck! They need to get closer to us by telling the truth in a gentle way. We should be equal and we should be each other’s best friend. Stop oggling..and treat us like the goddesses we are!
linda
on May 12 2009
Everyone looks…I’ll look at a sexy guy and it is alright for my hubby to look at a woman…just don’t oggle..that is rude to your spouse! And always make your spouse feel like number one..but mean it. Or we could get that feeling from somone else! Do NOT take us for granted!
aiea
on May 25 2009
Ironic that most articles about why men lie are written by women. Men and women are not equal nor will they ever be equal. The brains are wired differently. If you want a man to be honest all the time, then the woman needs to provide an environment where he will feel safe. Men learn to lie to their woman due to the responses he gets from her. If she accepts what he says, doesn’t judge, doesn’t try to change him or his thinking, doesn’t yell, bitch, etc. with what he says, then he won’t lie. Problem is most woman will judge, complain, and refuse to accept the mans response as it is. Therefore, the man must lie to avoid extreme pain inflicted by the woman. And yes, to the woman it is not painful, but to a man being nagged and judged over an honest statement is pure torture. Most men would rather have a finger cut off than to go through the torture of nagging and bitching. For most men, they only lie because the woman has taught them to lie.
candy
on June 27 2009
I’m tired of hearing men justify lying because they don’t have the balls to handle the repercussions when a woman responds to the truth with emotion. Real men have the spine to handle it, and aren’t AFRAID to be honest.
Darlene
on July 4 2009
Well, let me see now…every guy i know will lie and has lied although womon lie to.. but nothing like a man will it wouldent matter if they have the most beautiful girl in the whole world they will still lie and cheat. To find that dream man every girl is looking 4 you will be searching your whole life good luck ladies!!
keisha
on July 11 2009
I believe that men lie because they know by telling the truth will result in losing the woman. I have been in a situation where a man has constantly lied to me. There are various reasons men lie,but I think the main one is because they are cheating. When a man has been cheating they will lie about their whereabouts to keep so called peace. They lie about their age, what they do for a living, if they are seeing someone are married. Some are so used to lying they don’t know what the truth is. A lot of relationships are based on lies because that’s what they start off with.
joelis
on September 16 2009
Ladies, lets don’t forget that we had lie too. Yesterday I got emocionally hurt by my man bc he lie. But then I remember that I’m not perfect either I had lie as well. Of course it doesn’t mean that I’m going to let him cheat on me or something really bad, because no body is perfect… let’s be really we are like them, we had feel those feelings of not saying the entire truth bc of fear, or the way he might react, etc… if we said that they lie, and we don’t we become worse liars…
Kabii
on November 2 2009
We all lie, but men lie even about the obvious things i.e. have you paid rent? Yes, yet he knows he hasnt and will only fess up when you are being thrown out of the house. Explain that!
char
on November 4 2009
Ok,men lie and so do women, but why would a man lie about getting a phone call from another woman to his partner, and the partner knows the other woman…..but yet he still insists he never got the call nor talked to the other woman and yet the partner has proof he did…..why lie when the partner knows…..and yet when she confronts him in a nice way he still lies….why do men do this
Becky
on January 26 2010
What if the man lies about little things? Like facebook and his is hours of work?
donna
on July 10 2010
They lie because they are ashamed and think that their pride is important and need to protect pride, so they lie to themselves.